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POTTYMINTS: 3 Self Quarantine Bathroom Rules for a "Captive" Audience!


This is it…

 Like a prize fighter entering the ring, you feel you have prepared as much as humanly possible.

You have pushed yourself to the limits both mentally and physically.

The blood, the sweat, the tears… the time put into every meticulous movement all come down to this one moment…

 As the iconic boxer Mike Tyson once said – “Everyone has a plan 'till they get punched in the mouth.”

 … you are now stuck at home, sharing a bathroom with your significant other for 14 days … Sh*t

 No amount of Toilet Paper hoarding is going to prepare you for this one

 

We here at POTTYMINTS feel it is our responsibility, nay – our duty (pun intended) to give you Three Bathroom rules for the time being.

 

Rule #1: Wash Your Hands

Listen, I am no Dr. Anthony Fauci – but as someone that works in the Bathroom Industry… regardless of an International Pandemic– Wash your hands!

 Singing Two “Happy Birthdays” is a nice start, but no one actually gets two Happy Birthdays sung to them on their actual Birthday…

 Feel free to use these instead:

  • “My Corona” (Sung to the tune of “My Sharona” – The Knack)
  • “Sorry” - Justin Bieber ( for when it is FAR too late to say sorry…)
  • “Part of that world” - The Little Mermaid (we all want to be where the people are…) 

 

Rule #2: You Don’t Need a Mask

 We out of all people get it… we deal with bad bathroom odors on a daily basis… it’s kind of our “thing”

We understand that it was “Burrito Night” … but please – keep the masks for the medical professionals that need them.

 Please avoid buying or wearing a Mask to deal with Bathroom odors!

 

Rule #3: Stop Stockpiling Toilet Paper

While humans have had incredible ingenuity and technological breakthroughs in our entire history…

We created the incredible pocket-sized technology, we put a man on the moon, we put wheels on luggage… (a bit late on this one, but still ingenious nonetheless) …

We must recognize that Toilet Paper isn’t going anywhere… anytime soon.

It has withstood Wars, Epidemics, Droughts and any tragic event… literally whenever the “Sh*t has hit the fan”… it will continue to be there for us!

PLEASE Let’s not hoard toilet paper – and let’s be respectful of those people that need it. There is plenty to go around.

 

While we here at POTTYMINTS try and keep our spirits up during these challenging times, we do hope that you and your families stay safe and follow the instructions of the CDC and our elected officials.

 We hope that you stay safe, stay informed, and spend this quality time with those you love – and please if you can, stay inside.

POTTYMINTS